Main Tips: For Man On Top Lovemaking
- Great position to get started in: it’s comfortable, safe and relaxing.
- The man on top is mostly in control so he has to put the work in!
- The woman gets to to relax, but she has limited scope for movement or action.
- Eye contact can be romantic and connecting, but can also be experienced as claustrophobic.
Man on top is the most popular sexual position for lovemaking. It’s sexy, it’s comfortable, and it allows the man to feel dominant and the woman to feel feminine and receptive to her man – perhaps even to feel a little like she’s being “taken”.
Many women say that man on top sex makes them feel safe and protected. It’s certainly a good position for intimate kissing, bodily contact, and looking deeply into your partner’s eyes as you make love.
Besides all this, it’s a very easy and natural way to make love. In fact, man on top is a sex position which is ideal for almost everyone: It’s the most straightforward and possibly the most satisfying position of them all.
And there are many ways to enjoy it, as you can see here.
I guess I am starting from the assumption that sex in most positions is a great thing. What’s unique about man on top?
I agree that it is a really comfortable position, especially for women: we can do the lazy, proverbial “lying on our backs” thing and enjoy.
It is a very intimate position from a woman’s perspective and very relational. The partners can see into each other’s faces and eyes, which can be loving and alleviate insecurities for both partners.
The man on top position is probably where most people start out with each other. It’s safe and culturally acceptable and reaffirms gender roles for males and females.
What are the drawbacks of the man on top? Actually, I think there are quite a few.
Firstly, it restricts women’s pelvic movements and means the female partner has to be fairly passive.
It’s really hard work having to lift your pelvis off the bed and thrust against gravity and your man. This translates into you guys having to do all the physical work during sex, which can be exhausting and a real turn-off.
What if you want to have sex, but you’re tired from your day at work? (Answer: don’t choose this position).
Your body might be more inclined to give up on its erection if you are tired and you are having to be quite active as compared to a position in which you need less strength.
After all, man on top means you thrust, and it also means you need to support your body weight off the bed for a prolonged period of time.
Also, man on top doesn’t allow the woman to adjust the angle of her pelvis much, so she can’t direct his thrusts easily to the areas inside her vagina where she can feel him best.
However, sex in this position can feel safer for a women due to her internal anatomy: her lover will thrust towards the bottom and back of her vagina and there is less likelihood of his thrusts touching sensitive areas inside of her body such as the G-spot or the cervix, the latter possibly being quite uncomfortable if she is not psychically aroused.
Of course, if you are into relaxing and chilling out during sex, man on top is great (if you are female, that is).
Another major consideration for the man on top position is that sustaining eye contact right through can feel claustrophobic during sex.
You may feel like all your reactions are being watched or that you have to be constantly emotionally available to your partner rather than being able to give in to your own physical sensations.
If you’re struggling to stay with your own sense of arousal, eye contact can be very distracting.
Also, it’s easy to notice distraction or insecurity in your partner’s face, which may only be there temporarily, but which starts to ricochet between both of you and ends sex all together.
Video – Laci Green On Sex Positions
Sex in this position can be slow and relaxed, or fast and furious, depending on your mood and how aroused you’re feeling.
If you fancy gentle, relaxed lovemaking, you can move only a little, lying together kissing and cuddling with just enough movement to keep his erection firm.
Once connected through the act of penetration, many men and women experience a sense of fulfillment and connection that is rewarding to them whether or not the man thrusts.
If this is a new idea to you, try just lying still after penetration next time you make love. If you feel the urge to thrust, choose instead to lie still, and see if you experience this sense of intimate connection.
And if you lie still for fifteen minutes or more you may find that the sexual energy between you gradually increases – sometimes to orgasmic levels.
Or you could try some more unusual movements instead of pelvic thrusts.
For example, gently rocking on each other as the man lies on top of his partner rather than all-out thrusting can produce some wonderful sensations, and with a bit of trial and error it’s possible to get into a position during sex where the man’s pubic bone stimulates the woman’s clitoris.
Another interesting variation is to move your hips in a circular pattern rather than to thrust in and out: this can feel wonderful!
And since the vagina is most sensitive nearest its outer edges, shallow penetration in which the man inserts his penis an inch or two and then withdraws again before re-entering to the same depth can be very teasing and enjoyable.
It’s also extremely pleasurable for a man if his partner can use her vaginal muscles to squeeze his penis as it rests inside her.
Even in the man on top position, which doesn’t allow for a lot of movement and sounds quite fixed, you can experiment a bit.
Both man and woman can play with the angle of their hips and the force with which they connect as well as with full body contact and stillness. Try tipping or rotating your pelvis and see what happens.
Also, feel free to use your hands too! Both male and female partners can easily reach either their own or each other’s sexual parts as well as hips, buttocks, anus and breasts – this adds quite a bit of extra stimulation.
Man on top can also be a position that can contain a lot of energy between the two of you.
Because both of you are held together by gravity you can really have a go at pushing into each other and using a lot of energy to connect with each other.
Man on top sex illustrated
If you’re thinking, “Well, what is there to illustrate?” the answer is this: while we all tend to find one position we like and stick to it, there are many variations of the man on top position, all of which give you a slightly different experience during sex.
Some of these you’ll really enjoy, some of them will be less intense for you: no two couples are quite alike when it comes to lovemaking. you may need lubricants to help during intercourse if the woman has a dry vagina.
Even in what most people would think of as the basic man on top positions, there can be immense variations in the sensations for each partner.
How high does the man support himself? Maybe he even lies on her, if she likes this pressure. Does he have his legs inside or outside hers?
If he has them inside, she will be easily receptive to him at the moment of penetration – but if she keeps her legs more closely together, her vagina will be tighter, and the sensations will be much more intense for them both.
That may make him reach orgasm more quickly.
How high does she raise her legs? In general, the deeper she raises them, the deeper he can penetrate.
That may be more or less enjoyable for each of them, depending on all kinds of things – how well-endowed he is, how relaxed and aroused she is, whether she actually likes deep penetration, and so on.
Sidenote: all men sometimes need help to control rapid ejaculation during sex – and the great news is that this is not such a challenge as you might think!
If you happen to be one of the 50-75% of men who ejaculate too quickly, either for their own liking or that of their partner, and you have a strong desire to end premature ejaculation, last longer in bed, and gain greater control of your ejaculation, then help is at hand in the form of a self-help treatment program for men with rapid ejaculation.
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I really agree here with Rod. Don’t get too cozy with the man on top position and what you might consider as routine sex. Try things out, even in this position. There is a lot of scope for flexibility. Try different positions for your legs and bodies and see how it affects your sexual experience.
One of the greatest pleasures of sex can be the fulfillment of deep penetration. Not only can this feel wonderful, but it can make a couple feel very emotionally connected.
Sure, the emotional experience of deep penetration is going to be different for a man and a woman, but it does seem to fulfill some very deep and primal instinctual needs for both sexes.
The deepest penetration in man on top sex is achieved when a woman is positioned lying back with her legs raised.
Fast and deep thrusting, which is easy in this position, can be very rewarding for both partners, especially if the angle of a man’s penis and his partner’s vagina are such that his erection rubs on her G-spot as he thrusts.
It’s odd really that our sexual anatomies are so different: men I guess will experience the greatest stimulation at the tip of their penis (so I am told) and deep thrusting makes sense for that.
Women on the other hand feel most sensation in the outer third of their vagina, as well as their vulva and clitoris, so deep thrusting may or may not be special to a woman.
However, some women get turned on if the cervix deep inside their vagina is stimulated during sex, and others experience contractions around the uterus during orgasm.
Sidebar: How to make a woman come — advice for men!
The G-spot is a sensitive area of tissue on the upper wall of the vagina about an inch or two inside. Men whose erect penis curves upwards will be especially able to stimulate their partner’s G-spot when making love in the man on top position. (Other men may find it easier to stimulate the G-spot during rear entry sex.)
And it’s certainly possible for some women to reach a vaginal orgasm through G-spot stimulation alone, though usually this will require a fairly prolonged period of thrusting by her partner.
Unfortunately sex in the man on top position tends to make many men come quite quickly: the deep pelvic thrusting, the deep penetration, and the excitement of seeing his penis thrusting into his partner’s body – all of these things can cause a man to ejaculate quite quickly.
To help prevent premature ejaculation, try this – it’s all about overcoming premature ejaculation easily.
Sometimes it’s a bit easier and more comfortable for a couple if they place a pillow under her hips. This lifts her pelvis slightly and allows the man more freedom of movement. He can pull her onto him, thrust deeply, and, if he is kneeling, touch her clitoris and vulva if she finds this arousing.
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If you think about the mechanics of it, I think it’s fairly obvious that man on top isn’t the best position to stimulate a woman’s G-spot as this isn’t where his pressure is directed.
On the other hand women’s G-spots are very variable so each woman needs to discover what works best for her.
What’s not so good about the man on top position is that the woman has so little room for movement and therefore will find it hard to direct his thrusting to the right place inside of her.
To stimulate her G-spot, it would make sense for her to have her legs on the inside of his as she can then use them to squeeze him tight and increase the pressure and sensations for both of them.
I take the point about men being very visual and getting turned on by the view in front of them as well as the sensations they’re experiencing. I’m not sure many women think about that sort of thing.
By shifting his position so that his angle of penetration changes slightly, as shown below, the man’s penis will touch different parts of his partner’s vagina as he thrusts, which can be very exciting for her.
Simply thrusting in the same angle and direction can sometimes become a bit boring for her!
Yeah, I agree! However, I hope you guys don’t feel like you need to take all the responsibility for making it work for her. She can move around too you know!